Healing Trauma Today

The way we live has an impact on our sense of safety as a human being.   We all need to feel loved and to have a purpose to live happily.

Finding Your Inner Being or Self Leader Within

We are reminded to live according to our moral compass that is encouraged by our inner being or soul essence that is also developed through positive role models.   When we feel loved by our role models, we are more easily able to know what our soul essence is, and this is a light that guides us to make positive life decisions impacting ourselves and others in a meaningful way creating safety in our world.

How we live life depends on how we see ourselves as our life journey begins and ends with ourselves.   Our inner world is made up of our thoughts, emotions, experiences and memories, and this is how we come to know ourselves.   Trusting our inner being also known as our ‘true self’ is the main guidance needed to live well.  When we feel vulnerable and feel the vulnerability in our loved ones we make contact with our true self.   Our true self lets us know about difficult thoughts, feelings and memories we have about feeling vulnerable and desperate.  Such difficulties arise when facing a possible relationship breakup or a family member being unwell.   Confronted by possible separation, abandonment and loss, challenges us to deal with our fear of not being able to manage.  The fear and anger do not go away until we find ways to manage difficult emotions and situations.

Commencing Therapy

First, we need to know how we feel and be prepared to notice when we are feeling scared and stuck.  This is a good time to consult with a therapist and gain support to heal trauma.  When we understand and know we are stuck it is time to clean up our life and make amends with our partner or family members.

Turning away from repairing significant relationships is scary when we realize we are stuck and cannot move forward to living life joyfully.  When we do not know how to be with difficult circumstances, and nor can we manage difficulties we often fall back onto habitual ways of coping, which is problematic for our health and wellness in life.   Some unhelpful patterns that keep us stuck are justifying our position or not questioning or understanding our behaviour.   This inaction can take us away from what we are wanting to achieve in our lives.

For example, someone who is married who has an affair hoping to ‘get something’ such as love or attention will cause more distress for themselves and their current relationship and family.   Indulging a part of ourselves that cannot resolve the unhappiness in our relationship or with another perpetuates the struggle of feeling ‘stuck’ in life.

Getting Back On Track

One important way to get back on track is to turn towards our vulnerability and open up to process difficulties becomes inevitable to live well.

To make this happen we need to resolve our trauma wounds and make amends with loved ones.  Then we can and we will want to spend quality time with our loved ones.

To this end we need to be patient, responsible, steady, stable and grounded in building our capacities to love and be loved by our loved ones and regain our love for living life.

Reference: Author: Dr Steven Hayes, Book: A Liberated Mind: How to Pivot Toward What Matters; 2019.